New Year, New Mindset 5 Things You Can Change in 2021
It’s officially the first week of 2021 and, like many, I am sad to report that I do not feel any different. I have the same sense of anxiety about my life as my 28th birthday creeps around the corner. I even still have the same doubts and fears about my relationship with freelancing and imposter syndrome, as well as an adequate idea of what my future will look like 6 months from now. But there is one thing I can tell feels different from previous years.
First, I feel lucky to be alive and typing this at this moment. I’ve been blessed enough to survive a worldwide pandemic that’s robbed millions of people of their chance to enjoy 2020 with their families. I was even blessed enough to not catch COVID despite a household family member catching and potentially exposing us all to it. They’re better thank the lord. But it was still a scary situation. But the thing that makes the most difference for me is that for the first time in my life i’ve had the chance to sit still and look at where my life is now and know that it’s not where I want to be. Something has to change. I have to change. Especially if I want this life full of health and financial abundance that I keep reposting motivational instagram memes of.
You know..I always thought it was funny how people say manifest what you want but they don’t talk about the steps in between. They don’t talk about the getting ready part. They say blanket statements like “Just do the work.” But no one expounds on what that looks like for them or how their version of do the work might not fit for everyone. So..in honor of bringing a new mindset into the new year, i’m gonna share what doing the work and what showing up for myself looks like in this moment.
1. Move Consistently
As a plus sized girl in a quarantined world, the last thing I want to do outside of laying in bed and watching Rege-Jean Page be fine on Bridgerton is do a burpee. But i’m going to be honest about something. I’ve only been plus-sized as an adult for the last two or three years. And though I enjoy having a thicker appearance, i’ve gotten to a point where i’m not happy with my body the way I was about 35 lbs. ago. It affects everything in my life. My confidence, my mental health, my anxiety and what I allow and choose not to allow in my interactions with the outside world. So, instead of just accepting what is as what will be forever, i’m adopting the motto “I Can Change That” for this area of my life. I have anxiety and i’m overweight…..I can change that with the Chloe Tings 2 weeks shred and my new sweet sweat band and gel. Both of which I have started day one with. I still hate to work out...but my anxiety level is lower and once i’m consistent my body will start to look like a better version of me.
2. Collect Your Flowers..Even From Yourself
For 2021, I vow to stop selling myself short and accept the flowers that come my way. A major issue that i’ve come to realize about myself is that i’ve allowed myself to be so humble or rather think it’s selfish of me to celebrate my wins that I don’t fully enjoy them. I don’t get too excited out of fear that the rug could be pulled from underneath me at any moment. I look at things from a glass half empty point of view. It’s only in this recent year that i moved from having anxiety about “what if I fail” to moving past that fear and saying “What if I succeed? What if I do an amazing job and it leads to more?” Thankfully, it has led to some great experiences and will lead to even greater opportunities in 2021.
3. Don’t Be Afraid to Put Yourself First
One of the biggest aspects of life that I struggle with is the concept of putting myself first. By nature, I am very nice and eager to please, but that has landed me in many situations in life where I have been used and taken for granted. I was raised to believe that you give people your all and don’t ask for anything in return and any sign of boundaries on my end were disrespectful or the highest form of selfishness. I know...YIKES. But at the age of 27, I have grown to realize that that was crazy. Now I don’t intend to be so selfish that I become a narcissist. But a healthy level of established boundaries, only accepting people in my life who are emotionally intelligent, sending the invoice, and making sure my cup is full will ensue this year.
4. Speak Up for What You Want
Closed mouths don’t get fed. In 2021 my goal is to grow my career, my bank account and create opportunities that are in alignment with the life I want this time next year. For me that looks like reaching out to mentors in areas of beauty that I want to expand to outside of public relations, asking for that increase when quarterly reviews come up, and negotiating invoice terms with freelance clients as well. I will be where the money resides and invoices are paid on time.
5. Apply for New Opportunities
Send in the proposal for that freelance opportunity. Apply for that job, even if it’s in another state. One thing that 2020 has taught me is that a part of growth is knowing when to stand still and when to move forward. You’ll never grow if you don’t go after what you want. And if you’re scared...then do that shit scared and well branded.
